Opinions from outside:
A lovely lady whom I look up to for her natural health knowledge wrote a beautiful article about weight discrimination happening to someone they love. It was really dear to my heart because it is written so thoroughly and from an outside perspective.
Opinions from Inside:
Yesterday I was at a bachelorette party and realized that while I’ve worked very hard at accepting myself and having body peace, I was still being critical of self. The rest of the girls at the party were typical sizes and I was the only plus size girl. I wore black slacks and a fun top and ruched jacket over it while everyone else had modest mid thigh black dresses and showed a little leg. First, I felt bad that I might have been underdressed, and two, I didn’t have the fancy heels and club-type apparel like the rest of them. I even spent an unnecessary 10 minutes debating what covered my arms best and realized I shouldn’t have felt ashamed to hide them.
We all carpooled, 5 of us total, in one car. And that’s where my self-discrimination started setting in. I panicked for a second wondering if they’d make me sit up front because I’m biggest or if people would complain if I was sitting in the back.
“Bride to be in the front!” The driver called out. She deserved the front passenger seat and they didn’t even think twice about her being up front.
I took a deep breath and slid in the back and tried to pretend I could take up less space. Nobody complained on the ride to our destination or on the way back home. Nobody called out my black slacks instead of dress. Nobody questioned my kitten heels when everyone else had stilettos. They treated me kindly. I was my worst offender.
Sometimes we are the worst discriminator. We make our weight a big deal when it’s not. I know this is something I need to work on. Yes, I am conscious that I take up more space, but I shouldn’t make it a bigger deal than it is. I rob my own joy when I self-consciously think about myself as being fat when I should be enjoying my time around others.
When the night ended, I was grateful that nobody made my size a big deal, and that I needed to worry about it less. I should reinvest those thoughts into encouraging reasons to exercise and eat right, if anything. And in hindsight, I wore kitten heels because I knew they’d be cute but comfortable with my top, and WE DID do a lot of walking and standing. I would have hated myself if I wore anything taller. And, I wanted to wear pants because I wasn’t in the mood to wear a dress. So, lesson learned. Be content of self. Have a good time. Don’t fret the details. Be grateful for people who see you as a person, not a large person, and treat you like everyone else. 🙂
I hate hate hate when people say I look well put together and then add “for a big girl”. I’m sitting there thinking “for real?” How is that a compliment? I dress to look nice. I don’t wear ill fitting clothing, the number one reason that makes the people wearing them not look as well as they can be regardless of physical size! IMO that is, lol!
So true, we can be our own worst offenders.