Letting Go and Room Logistics

Guys.

I found the craziest over the bed desk on Amazon and knew immediately this is what my small room needed. If you’ve followed my blog for a while, you know that I’ve been careful to not spend/invest in something without giving it a lot of thought and I have very cramped quarters.

My bedroom is also my office and living room since I’m “a renter”right now, so this allows me to bring the desk up on my bed and relax with netflix or work on designs and be nice and cozy. I can also wheel it off to where my old desk was, and while it takes up the majority of the wall, I can slide it as needed so now accessing my closet isn’t a hassle. My last desk only gave me enough room to slide up to the closet door and try to yank something down. So, this a big improvement.

The depth is also a huge plus. The new desk is roughly 17.5 inches deep. My previous desk was 46″ wide by 24” deep and that made it so it nearly touched the end of my bed. In the end, I have better walking clearance to my window and my closet without sacrificing too much desk space.

The downside is learning to let go. I love my old desk but it’s apparent that while it served me well at my old condo, it isn’t right for this place. I’m also letting go of my white bookshelf which means sorting through my books and letting go of some of them. I also have a beautiful wooden filing cabinet I’m bringing out of my closet. I’m not ready to let go of it, but it doesn’t work in my room. I’m scheming a way to store it but opening myself up to the possibility I might have to say goodbye. It’s hard but it’s exhilarating. I also have added a standing lamp so I no longer have to illuminate my entire room with a little ole LED study lamp and battery sucking stick on lights (that idea was a major fail!)

On Thursday my boyfriend is going to help me hang some picture ledges and move the old desk out. I can’t wait to show pictures of the new setup!

More Minimizing Musings

Over the course of the last few weeks, I’ve been inspired to research more about minimalism and capsule wardrobes. The ideals, while not right for me, are really helpful as I am still discovering what sparks joy in my life and how to look at my “stuff” with an honest and mindful eye.

I stumbled across a plus size capsule article that piqued my interest. Mostly because it offered so many valid points. Two stood out to me. First, as a fat gal, amen to the thighs eating pants! I know many minimalist blogs say invest in costly pieces that will last you but plus size gals know the difficulty that is rubbing the inner thigh portion of pants to a pilled or holey mess. The other point was most important. Minimalism as we see it today is a fad of living in excess and having a privileged life.

It’s easy for me to react to that and think I am not privileged, but I am. I like to think of it as being blessed and well cared for despite not making much, but it’s true. One of the reasons I’m in this pit is because I’ve allowed having a little more than enough become a consumerist issue. I’ve fallen prey to owning too much just because I can. How many hours have I wasted wandering aimlessly and getting joy from stuff I shouldn’t own? I should be considering this more carefully. It means I’ve been frivolous and have room to work on how I spend and save my money. It also means I need to be more mindful with what I keep and what I bring into my home.

Be a ruthless editor of what you bring into your home. Ask yourselves, “What does this object mean to me?” – Nate Berkus (interior designer)

Some of the things that inspire me from minimalism are:

1.  Seeking the best of the best in items.

For example, being purposeful and researching even little stuff like kitchen spoons to make sure you love using it and only need one or a few to do something well. It’s no longer about savings or quantity, the value is rather placed in form, function, and purpose. For a kitchen item, that purpose may be more utilitarian. For a necklace however, that might be form – the pendant goes with many styles, function – the chain doesn’t pull hair out and is easy to clasp, and purpose – makes me feel beautiful and put together. If I apply this what gives me joy (KonMari) it makes it easier to make decisions on what goes in my home and what I let go of.

2. Mindfully opening up your space and life.

The best minimalist blogs treat minimalism with a purpose. I found out that there are two types of minimalism. One is domestic, and that is have a system that works for an efficient home and life. The other is travel based, and that is where you see people limiting to the extreme in pursuit of fun experiences over items. I used to think minimalists were just fans of all things white and black and boring, but there is no hard rule unless you’re going for extreme. Walls don’t need to be blank, furniture doesn’t have to be modern, but everything is edited down to essentials and the idea is to only own what fits your purpose. Minimalists don’t think of themselves as limited but rather they are equipped with all that the need and don’t want to fuss with more because it’s not necessary or doesn’t fit their purpose. Less clothes means less laundry. Less furniture and nic nacs means easier and more efficient cleaning. Less buying means more financial freedom. All their minimalist choices serve a purpose.

3. Making the most of what you have.

Rather than thinking they are limited by their space or lack of extra things, they think of how to best work their space and make do with what they have. This is where I fall short the most. I am guilty of thinking “if only” quite a lot and wanting items I already have just because it’s a little nicer when what I have is fine. I need to tap into a spirit of contentedness and be grateful instead of wishful. Perhaps if I did better in the area of gratitude I’d  not be so tempted by retail therapy. When I was a kid, I didn’t have a lot of toys. I thrived on being resourceful and using some imagination to make what was around the house work. Later as a teen, I applied this concept to cooking with what ingredients were in the house and make fun meals that made me proud. Sure, it wasn’t Pinterest worthy, but it kept those items from spoiling and it was fun to experiment and not be restrained to a recipe. Making the most of what I had in those instances was really fulfilling. And it still is today.

Have you found your “a-ha” or “just right” point with belongings? If you have anything to add, please comment and let me know!

KonMari Tips for the Plus Sized

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As many of you know, I’m still in the process of tidying. I did fairly well for my last space but moved and now need to find that ‘ah-ha!’ for my smaller space.

I have inquired about tips for plus sized but haven’t heard back officially unless Marie Kondo has touched on this subject in Spark Joy which I’m nearly halfway through.

There are a few hiccups for doing the KonMari method with plus sized clothing…

1. Our clothes tend to be wider and longer
2. Our clothes are more bulky in general
3. Our folding method articles often stand too “tall” to stand in an average dresser drawer
4. Some of us have more cover-up or modesty pieces (personal choice)
5. It can be hard to Spark Joy with certain articles of clothing depending on body type notions

1. Wider Longer Clothes

Our clothes require a few extra steps to fit our drawers better. I like to overlap the sleeves over each other more. This keeps the folded piece from being too long. A size L or XL person may not not have as much difficulty with width, but may need help with length. For length, take your finger and make imaginary lines or actually press into the garment where you would fold it until it’s short enough to fit the depth of your drawer.

File side to side, not front to back. This will help you fit more clothes and see everything in your drawer.

2. Bulky Items

Heavy winter pieces and outerwear DO NOT take up less space for us when folded. They take up whole drawers. Kondo suggests not hiding your clothes or storing them elsewhere lest you neglect the item. Here’s my suggestion:

Put your heavy sweaters, robes, and outerwear all in your coat closet (if you have one). Make sure you don’t keep ANY of them in your bedroom or other closets or you’ll be breaking the KonMari principal of all of one thing in one place. Or, use vacuum bags to suck up the air (individual bags per coat/sweater) and hang them in your closet on pant clips. Marie speaks of considering each piece and treating it with care, but unfortunately, your snow jacket will eat a good portion of closet space if you just hang it. Keep it loved by folding it and only using one garment per vacuum bag. Think of it as a case to display not to confine. It helps keep other clothes from getting lost in its bulk.

Do fold: slinky crochet sweaters, thin knit cardigans, lightweight sweaters, raglans, long sleeves, items that don’t wrinkle easily

Do Hang: jersey knit open sweaters, thicker cardigans, heavy but not bulky sweaters, embellished sweaters, raincoats, trenchcoats, heavy wool items, silky slippery materials

3. Items Stand Too Tall for Your Drawer

This isn’t just a problem for plus size people. Perhaps you are a standard or petite size but own some tunics that you wear with leggings or as short dresses and need to work them into a drawer. Or perhaps your significant other or son aren’t large in the weight sense but are just very tall and buy extra long clothes.

Remember how many folds you used and try adding one to two more folds to get it smaller. Remember to taper the folds a bit to help it “stand.” Draw an imaginary line or gently press down to crease where you would fold until you find that number. Remember how many folds you need for that type and they should fit.

4. More Layering Items

Just to clarify, this isn’t a problem for everyone. This is something I’ve noticed for me, though. Being overweight, I find I personally have more undershirts to smoothe my silhouette or to make low cut or thin tops more modest. I am busty and while I understand some cleavage is bound to happen, I don’t like being self conscious about shirts revealing more than I like if I bend over or slouch or cross my arms. Clingy shirts tend to show my rolls and so I use undershirts to make them less visible or have the shirt hang better. I also like to add cover ups like boleros and cardigans and open jersey knit sweaters to cover my arms and keep perpetually cold me comfortable temperature wise. They don’t all spark joy because of how they look, but they spark joy for the extra comfort they give me. If you feel guilty about keeping a lot of layering pieces, you may feel like I do. That they help you feel more comfortable and help you wear your clothes better. Don’t feel bad.

Don’t keep everything, though. Be honest. Maybe you have some white undershirts or tanks that are em…not truly white anymore. They’re now yellowing from regular wear and are so off white you can’t show them under deep v’s and scoops so you hide them under thin tops. That’s when I’d say it’s time to thank it and let it go. Or maybe you have 10 black undershirts and really only need 4 to rotate through. Find which ones flatter you most and thank the others and donate the rest. Same with the layering pieces. If you find that you are just trying to hide stuff, maybe it’s time to say goodbye to those tops or dresses and find more flattering pieces. If that outerwear isn’t versatile enough to wear with other pieces from your closet, maybe that top/dress and that outerwear piece both need to go into the donate pile.

 5. Body Types and Being Uniquely You

Whether you enjoy/are comfortable being plus size or are struggling with it, remember clothing is a way we get to express ourselves. We are all unique. Some people struggle with being super slim, other people struggle with carrying extra weight. Others easily embrace their size. Wherever you are, don’t let your unique shape be a negative. Part of the KonMari process is to learn more about yourself and where you want to be. Do you need to make body peace? Do you need new clothes that express who you are? Do you need to let go of smaller sizes that rob your joy for the pieces that fit you currently?

Perhaps you carry it all in hips. Or all in your belly. Or you feel disproportionate. I guarantee you that you’re not alone in these feelings. Get rid of articles of clothing that bring you down. Allow yourself to only buy clothes that spark joy so you don’t have negative energy in your closet. Or remember that you have that piece of clothing because it’s functional and meets a need. Create a sense of style that helps you shine and displays more than the physical appearance of you. Something that defines you as a whole – body, spirit, and mind.

Maybe you’re placing all that focus into clothes when it’s accessories that will bring that expressive factor. Bright scarves? Dainty earrings? Loud statement necklaces? Soft and sweet hairstyles and hairbands? Nerdy pins on your purse or sweater that proclaim your fandom or smarts? If you can’t communicate who you are to the world with your clothes, go for that wow factor with accessories. Whether you gain more weight or lose weight in the future, these pieces aren’t defined by your size. They exist to help you show who you are, at any size. Let them add joy.

I hope these tidbits help you! Please give me some KonMari tips too, I am all ears!

Life Happenings: Moving, Bible Journaling, Organizing

The move is over! It’s crazy how arduous an in-town move can be. It didn’t help that I was sick and lacking sleep. On Saturday, I had a great set of helpers and we got a majority of the larger items moved via a uHaul truck. On Sunday, we tackled the “small stuff” and boy did we have a lot of small to sweat! My roommate and I went over bright and early and I quickly realized how much we’ve accumulated. She was a dear and let me concentrate on my room while she packed up the entire kitchen. Because of our change in living situations, she has to be more conservative of what she could take so I’ve got a lot of stuff packed under my name that we shared to sort through and donate.

Around 2pm, we realized that it was more than we could handle. My mom offered to come help and I realize now that she did a majority of the wiping down/vacuuming/sweeping/etc for us! So grateful for her help! Our knees and legs were also giving out so around 4pm we rallied up my brother and his friend. I don’t think I can ever live in a second story again! After two upstairs dwellings, this moving process was killer. I’m so done. I’m pretty sure I did about 50 trips or more total in three days up two sets of stairs and a third small set. Jello legs for days.

I never did get to belongings outside of clothing for the KonMari process, so I am taking the unpacking time to use the method to settle that. I still have WAY. TOO. MUCH. Even with paring down clothes, I realize I have too many still. KonMari requires you to tidy with a plan. What are my dreams? To be flexible and not be weighed down to belongings so when opportunities arise, I can take them. To keep messes minimal so I can be emotionally and mentally focused on creating and learning for career and personal development. So yes, that means much less.

On a fun note, I recently discovered bible art journaling and as I was searching for something that would encourage me in devotionals and keep my creative streak, I am so excited to start! The last few years the Bible has become newly refreshing to me. It’s like I’m seeing it with a brand new pair of eyes. Now I can note all I’m learning with not only words but pictures.

KonMari Method Part 1

Last weekend I decided to embark on putting the KonMari method to practice.

I am still working through the clothes category, but I decided to learn how to feel my “Joy Spark” with dresses since it’s probably my smallest category clothes wise.

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Admittedly, dresses are my most frivolous purchase. They make me feel beautiful and I like having a new dress to commemorate an extra special occasion. This year I had a wedding to attend, two graduations, and other functions and yes, I let myself buy a new one for each one. That’s probably how I ended up with 51 dresses total. Which, I’ll admit, is more than I ever needed! I whittled the collection down to 34 which still seems a bit large but does include extra dressy ones and ones I do rotate into my work wear. I don’t currently like how tunics look on my body right now as I’m heavier than when I purchased many of them (some of these items are a decade old) so it was easy to say goodbye to them.

Next, I did my bras, underwear, tights, and slips. I’ve always folded my undies as I think they look better that way but I did use a few shoeboxes to keep things compartmentalized and it made a huge difference! I wear a large cup and band size for bras so I think I will be moving my bras out of the drawer where they are being crumpled and jammed and put them in my closet.

And then, the madness of shirts and pants and tank tops. Oh my…that took up the rest of my day and I still have pants to work on as I mostly did shirts.

I’ll admit, getting things to stand and folding them KonMari style was more frustrating than I first thought. Because I am plus size, my clothes are wider and longer. This makes larger and longer rectangles that don’t stand as easily. I decided for pants to fold in the crotch area to bring the size down a little and for sweaters, to overlap a bit of shoulder to make them more compact. Despite frustration, the neat looking piles and streamlined look kept me motivated.

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I’m not a big shoe buyer so I reached out on freecycle for some clean shoeboxes and supplemented what I could find at the dollar store and Daiso. See how kempt everything is starting to look? Ahhh…

Remember how I said I’m plus size so my folded clothes are wider? I own a cheapie chest of drawers to begin with so it is not very deep or tall. My solution was to lay the clothes vertically. I was able to fit most of my folded tees into one drawer, where before it was a few drawers and then some. This was the most rewarding part of my day.

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I’m making progress! There’s much more to do this weekend. I also have a good amount of clothes to launder so I’m getting that out of the way so I’ll be ready to tackle part two.

From mostly tops alone, I filled two trash bags to donate. The dresses I plan to sell or give to someone (truly) in need of some.