What if I Lost It All the First Time?

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This weight loss question repeatedly comes through my head:

What if I lost it all the first time?

What if I never struggled with losing? What if, as everyone claims, weight loss is just ‘calories in and calories out’ and nothing more? What if I willed myself to drop the weight and did it in one go?  What if the last ten years I would have shopped in the “regular” sizes and removed all the setbacks I reasoned were due to weight?

But it’s never that damn easy. Ever. It’s not just stupid calories standing in my way. I’ve TRIED the starve it out method. I’ve – in teenage desperation – PRAYED for God to give me an eating disorder that results in weight loss. I’ve tried frantically to somehow magically jam my fingers in my throat in a way that would cause me to vomit. I’ve curled into fetal position crying on holidays when a relative insists it’s now or never and that I’m a beautiful person except from the neck down. I’ve denied outings with friends because they are beach or poolside or may be an activity that my fat potentially can’t handle. I’ve picked the healthy meals and watched others eat carelessly without the consequence like it would have on my body.

I dare anyone to say to my face I haven’t tried. The fact is unsuccessful weight loss does not mean someone isn’t trying. And if people wouldn’t tell someone who was underweight because of an eating disorder “just eat more calories,” why is it okay to shove the line “just eat less” in an overweight person’s face? I’m not saying that everyone who is overweight got there because of overeating or an eating disorder. But in most cases, it’s a gradual gain despite the worst assumptions out there. Overweight and obese people are often shown as lazy or gluttonous. People don’t usually see the emotional or physical stress the weight has on the body, they only want people to calorie restrict and sweat their asses off. Literally.

This is my thorn in the flesh. This is my struggle that I will have to deal with my entire life. And even if I lose it all now, it took years to mentally get to this point.

In retrospect, I am GLAD I didn’t lose it all the first time.

I’ve learned a lot about myself in the meantime. I’ve broken down a lot of walls and conquered a lot of fears. I’ve built confidence in my body image. I’m grateful that God spared me from getting what I selfishly wanted and I never dealt with anorexia or bulimia. I’ve had people compliment me on kindness, style, personality and grace…while being over 250 pounds. I have a boyfriend that loves me and accepts me as a whole: quirks, fat, and all. I’ve learned to shut out negative comments even if they still hurt me. I’ve learned that this is the only body I get so no matter what weight, I need to treat it well. I’ve learned about nutrition and health so it’s not just restricting calories, it’s a lifestyle that helps me make healthful choices.

Most importantly, I’ve learned this weight loss journey is for me. No one else.

It’s not to make my parents proud. It’s not to make someone love me more. It’s not to conform with society’s standards of femininity and beauty. It’s not to prove to the world anything. It’s for me. And before this renaissance, it wasn’t for the right reasons. It’s because I can love myself right now that I see this chapter of weight loss as a healthy one.

You see, in the last decade, I may have put on more pounds, but I lost a lot of insecurities and emotional weight. That was my first step all along…

I know that if and when I get to goal weight, I’ll finally see the same person in mirror. Not a person I wanted to be, but the person I am, just with less weight to carry. And that’s exactly what I want – not to lose myself in the process, just the physical and emotional weight. Because the Laura minus 80 or more pounds is still Laura. And she’s been Laura all along.

The Cute and Comfy Shoe Secret

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I have a secret to share with you guys. Maybe you already know this secret, but it’s something I’ve just slowly figured out and am excited to share. This shoe type is cute for ANYBODY. Tall, short, slim, plus size, and everything in between. It goes well with skirts, shorts, pants, crops, and even leggings. It has a chunkier heel and more toe support for better shock absorption and comfort. It holds your feet in place and often has some ankle support so there’s less klutz potential. And you can usually wear them for longer periods of time than heels.

Have you figured it out yet?

It’s clogs!

Yeah yeah yeah…the first thing that comes to people’s minds when they hear clogs is something like this:

 

And if that’s your thing, you keep on rockin’ them…

But these are the clog styles I have in mind. Clogs may be a bad word in fashion but these are incredibly cute!

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Over the last 5 or so years I’ve finally figured out a couple things about my feet.

1. Having large, wide width and flat feet, shoes are difficult to find. Period.
2. Being over 250 pounds means flimsy shoes stress my feet. They have A LOT to hold!
3. Ballet flats are dainty but rub my heels and pinky toe. I feel the shock and no support.
4. Heels over 2 inches really hurt me and stress my toes if standing/walking past 15 min.
5. There is more to life than flip flops. Sorry, Havianas.
6. People really do pay attention my shoes and feet. It’s a noticeable part of my outfit.
7. Rounded toe styles squish my feet less. That makes them happy.
8. I have long toes. Deep cut flats give me toe cleavage. Toe cleavage is gross.
9. My big gal calves don’t fit longer boot styles. This makes me sad, but it’s reality.
10. I am a practical shoe person, but I like to keep sneakers to workouts and outdoor activities.

So booties and clogs to the rescue! They provide a comfy shorter heel and more support for my feet. They tend to be more roomy which makes my wide width feet happy. They usually have a little upward curve to the toes or extra padding, which minimizes stress. I can walk in them without feeling like I’m wobbly and keep them on for long periods of time and be comfortable. They tend to look cute with and without socks and tights which means I can wear them year round. They also tend to make my outfits look more put together and I feel more fashionable in them.

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This isn’t me, btw. Photo credit unknown.

So, there you have it. Clogs are my new best friend.

I feel like booties are fairly easy to find in several types of styles. And clogs have always kind of been around, they are just highly overlooked. Many of you who follow my blog know that I’m trying to keep a KonMari mindset for my belongings. So I’m nixing a lot of those cheap flimsy shoes I hoarded from clearance end caps and sales. Those DO NOT bring me joy. Once I get enough pennies saved up, I’d like to purchase a pair of Swedish Hasbeen clogs, and once I reach 50 pounds lost, I would like to reward my hard work with a pair of Frye boots. If I stick with timeless styles and practical colors these shoes should pay for themselves with how well they wear.

Do you have any shoe advice to give me? Have you figured out what you like on your feet for style and comfort?

I’m Pro-Life, but…

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I’m Pro-Life, but…

1. I understand that most women are smart enough to know abortion is not a means of birth control to be performed several times and that many do not choose abortion flippantly.

2. I understand that while medical conditions are a very small percentage, abortions do happen because of things like ectopic pregnancies…where even pro-life women need to opt for an abortion.

3. I understand that one of the reasons abortion rates have dropped is because of access to birth control (sorry, I know there’s more to hormonal birth control, I won’t touch that in this entry.)

4. I understand that places like Planned Parenthood actually DO MORE than provide abortions – they provide care for several men and women who wouldn’t have access to care otherwise and provide medical and sexual health knowledge.

5. I understand that there are cases of rape and incest where the baby is a painful reminder of something traumatic that happened. (I do believe that baby is innocent, although a product of a horrible event, and abortion robs an innocent life, even in this situation.) I understand that it must be hard to have something happen and be stuck carrying a child to full term that someone may not want.

6. I understand that relationships, age, and financial situations may not always be ideal for welcoming a child and carrying a child to full term.

7. I understand that abortion is not an easy topic to discuss and that everyone has an opinion on it.

I don’t know all these things personally, but I do understand. And that’s why I cannot support the idea of making abortion illegal and defunding Planned Parenthood. 

I suppose with everything I’ve said, you are probably wondering where I personally stand. My stance is that ideally and morally, abortions would only be performed for #2: rare medical instances where aborting the baby means saving the mothers life, where the choice is to either have both die or let one live. And my heart goes out to everyone who carries a child because of rape or incest. I truly care about their hurt but cannot deny the personhood of their child and I know that is messy and others may not agree with me. I’m sorry rape and incest happen in our world. I know that the reality of foster care and adoption is that it’s not an easy thing and that children in the system do not always have a good childhood. I care about that too. But I advocate to choose adoption instead of abortion. That is my personal view.

Here is what I think are more helpful than trying to make abortion illegal or defund PP:

1. Pro-lifers should support local pregnancy centers. Volunteer, donate, fundraise. If you are religious, pray.

2. Pro-lifers should support local maternity homes for mothers who want to keep the baby but have no place to turn to or have a home life situation that puts them in danger. Volunteer, donate, fundraise. If you are religious, pray.

3. Pro-lifers should be open to more views than just public abstinence programs and should take the shame out of premarital pregnancies. Particularly in religious homes, where children may not be educated about contraceptives and sometimes not even given full education on the reproductive system and end up pregnant. A large percentage of women getting abortions identify as catholic or protestant. I personally think some may be getting them out of shame or fear. What if parents and religious communities supported those mothers first and foremost? It’s a given that not everyone who plans to be abstinent will stay abstinent. And ignorance on sexual reproductive health does not help anyone. I believe ignorance is destructive.

4. Pro-lifers should support foster care and adoption. Not everyone may have an ideal situation to adopt or foster, but for those who can, it truly shows your commitment to owning up to what one believes. How can one advocate fostering and adoption and not be open to helping these children in some way? There is always a way to help. Donations, fundraising, taking classes to get a better understanding of the process, being mentors, advocates, volunteers…the list goes on. There is SOMETHING each one of us can do to help the lives of these babies, kids, and teens.

5. Work on things on a personal, community, and state level. That has the most impact. Your voice may only be a whisper on the nationwide level, but in your own city? It can really be powerful and echo throughout the area. And on a one-to-one level? You could save a life or help support someone with a life-changing decision.

There was once a time when abortion was illegal, and when women had very little reproductive rights. I care enough about women as a whole to not want the horrors of that time repeated. I think we need to redefine what is acceptable without making abortion illegal. It’s a hot buzzword during election season – abortion and Planned Parenthood. People may not agree with my stance, but I think we can all agree seeing abortion and teen pregnancy percentages drop is something both pro-life and pro-choice can celebrate together. And we can agree that supporting pregnant women, reproductive/sexual health education, and our local community make a difference.

New Clothing Muse – It’s made in the US!

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I’m in trouble. I found a new brand of clothing I **REALLY** like. And no, I don’t sell them and I didn’t get any free products to review or anything. I was just invited to an online boutique event and liked what I saw. Haha. It’s called LuLaRoe.

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Here’s why I like it:

1. All their items except their leggings are made in the USA.
2. With that in mind, their prices are very fair!
3. They carry most items from XXS to 3XL.
4. They make leggings that flatter and fit large ladies like me.
5. Their clothing is modest but fun.
6. The shapes and styles are forgiving if you gain or lose weight.
7. The prints are unique to 1,000 pieces.
8. It’s a small business opportunity that helps women gain a side or full time income.
9. Their items dip lower in the back to be most flattering.
10. The models on their site all look happy and healthy and show a good range of sizes.

Let me clarify that when I say modest, I mean modest for my personal standards. I like to be comfortable and part of that comfort is not having to stress about necklines and hemlines. I personally do not like attention drawn to those areas as I prefer to wear clothing to express myself. And I think despite size and stretch, it’s an unwritten rule that bums should be covered when wearing leggings. Which they also keep in mind. And my fellow plus sizers know the struggle of a dress being perfectly cut for the front but riding a bit high in the back because of a well padded behind. That doesn’t happen here!

Keeping the KonMari mindset, I appreciate the idea of clothing that sparks joy and one of those joys is knowing that my tall and curvy leggings will not stretch out and will fit me at my current size of 20W all the way down to a size 12. It’s something that will stay in my closet even if lose an impressive amount of weight…which I hope to do gradually! It’s priced well but still enough that I consider each item I buy an investment piece and cannot impulsively fill my closet all at once. The leggings will definitely last me the longest in my journey to weight loss, but the other styles work well belted or cinched or tied too.  My favorite dressy pieces are the Amelias which are dresses with sleeves and hidden pockets with a flattering box pleat, and the Nicoles which are mid length sleeve dresses with a full circle bottom for twirling or swishing or heck, even sitting indian style on the floor. The Randys are baseball type tees which I think are really comfy but feminine.

Here are some pictures from LuLaRoe’s instagram:

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There’s a lot of prints, so it’s not everyone’s cup of tea. I love prints but even some of the ones I’ve seen have been too funky for me. But with the variety they offer, you’ll also see stripes, florals, and solids in the mix. See how varied the ladies are in their features and actual branding? I LOVE IT.

Here’s a picture of me modeling one of their funky tights. Unedited besides being cropped so you don’t see my toes which are in desperate need for a pedi!

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What are some brands you’ve found work well for your journey? I found City Chic last year, and LuLaRoe this year, and am very happy with those two resources. They make me feel good in what I wear.

A Time to Be Born, A Time to Die

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You’ll know that phrase from one of two places, if not both. It’s a fragment of Ecclesiastes 3 in the Bible and words from a Beatles song [Turn!Turn!Turn!] inspired from the former.

Last night, technically early this morning, it was my Uncle’s time.

One thing made his time very hard.

Yesterday was my birthday.

My work phone lit up and it was a familiar personal number. On the other side of the phone, my brother asked if I knew the plans today for my Uncle. Those plans.

Uncle N was admitted to the hospital over 20 days ago as a precautionary measure. They wanted to make sure his discomforts with something very treatable were taken into consideration. At most, he should have been there three days. But his body was already wearing out and so this little scourge is what sent his body snowballing into a decline. The medical staff and family determined he wasn’t able to survive outside of medical intervention that would only prolong his suffering.

On Monday I was told his body was failing him. On Tuesday I saw him in the weakest and most desperate state, so uncomfortable, so tired of fighting. On Wednesday his children gathered for goodbye. And yesterday, we surrounded him in love and cried many tears together. I had prayed selfishly earlier that day, please don’t let him die on my birthday. Please don’t make my day of celebration one also filled with sadness every year as I remember his passing. I saw the hurt around me though, and knew for certain it was his time. That everyone who gathered from near and far needed closure, needed this to happen as we were gathered together. So, fighting back tears that night, I went into the hospital restroom and prayed once more. Lord, it’s okay. You can take him home today.  I’m sorry for my selfish request. Please take him home peacefully.

He went to be with Jesus early this morning. We cried and hugged and cried and hugged some more. My cousin, his daughter, reached out for me and said, “It wasn’t your birthday. He didn’t leave on your birthday.” And with that I had peace.

Creatures of the Night

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Sky reflects the ebony
Of the asphalt under foot
Grab one cart and stroll
Through a grocery store
There’s no list
Just listlessness
As I’ve often brought before.

Creatures of the night
Weighing apples
Reading labels
Checking cartons full of eggs
Chucking in a loaf of bread
Hoarding sections to themselves
Walking in the dust
Of where others have tread.

Where were you
When the warm light
Was on your shoulders
Basking in the
Golden glow
Or earning pennies
For your keep
Why walk these vacant aisles
When most others are asleep?

And I wander
Alongside them
Past the yogurts
Past granola
Scanning red tags and
Sales signs
Tallying what’s
In hand

If I gave away my secret
They would scurry
On their way
If I admitted
Too many people
Would be here
In the day

Too many to wonder
Who they are
To see them as
Individuals
When I’m
Dodging my cart out of the way

But at night
We all are people
And as I pass
I wish them well
Though they only do their shopping
And have nothing to tell

Spinny Chairs, Soup Cans, and Other Splendors

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On Saturday my boyfriend and I took advantage of the free admissions to some major museums. We made a day trip to two art museums: the LACMA and the Hammer Museum. I sometimes forget how fortunate I am to live close enough to a major metropolitan. The work of classic and modern figures like Matisse, Renoir, Monet, Picasso, Braque, Warhol, and more are just a drive away. And featured at the LACMA, works by Elaine Lustig Cohen, which made my designer heart flutter.

The Hammer Museum is always free, so on a day when you can go elsewhere for free which usually costs, it’s lax and devoid of congestion. I’ve been to the LACMA several times, but this was my first time ever at the Hammer Museum. When one usually thinks art museum, one thinks structured, grandiose, and somewhat serious. This place feels entirely different. I walked up to the front desk, got my stickers, and as the person pointed to open exhibits on the map, she added, “Don’t forget to check out our lounge and ping pong area up stairs.” We walked up and in the courtyard were these huge chairs and people laughing as they gripped the sides and spun around. Functional and playful!

Here’s a video of the functional art pieces in action:

Chairs at Hammer Museum

At the risk of admitting puerile pleasures, I will say that the spinny chairs and ping pong break really added to my experience. I also couldn’t believe my luck at their permanent collection. I feasted my eyes on art by French and European greats. Josh’s favorites were Gustave Moreau’s King David (1878) and Salomé Dancing before Herod (1876).
Talk about visual opulence. On a more contemporary note, I loved Catherine Opie’s portraiture. Her dramatic lighting is so painterly and visceral. What is not subtract by shadow is large, detailed, and impacting.

LACMA was PACKED. Like, nearly sweltering as the A/C couldn’t keep up with the droves of art amateurs and enthusiasts alike. We weaved through much of it as quickly but efficiently as possible while taking breathers outside to cool down and get away from crowds. To my dismay, the Rain Room was sold out for the day. The highlight of LACMA for me was their graphic design exhibit on Alvin Lustig and Elaine Lustig Cohen. And revisiting pieces I always anticipate each time. In the contemporary section, we both had to point Warhol’s iconic Campbell soup painting and the Litchenstein’s work.  Josh enjoyed the Egyptian art and lavish religious art/sculpture best. We have very different preferences in art appreciation and that worked out well for such an impressive amount of work in one museum. We both pointed out different things to each other.

I know he would have enjoyed our outing either way, but when I mentioned getting Dim Sum before tackling the sites, I think that sealed the deal. 😉

 

Does Anyone Have it All Together?

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You’ve heard it before: “They seem to have it all together.”

That person looks like they are the model citizen – someone to aim to be like in most if not all ways. They’re rational, inspirational, well-rounded, innovative, and just seem to have everything going in their favor. From what we can see, through our rose colored glasses, their life is envious. We examine our own lives and beat ourselves over where we think we fall short in terms of personal or societal expectations.

Does anyone have it all together?

The high school sweethearts are finally married and have a love story that would compel Nicholas Sparks to turn it into a novel. They never expected their small combined income would cause them to move thousands of miles away from where they grew up and desperately miss all their family and friends. And still, they are scraping by.

The successful businessman is at every charity, well loved, and the social media pictures of his lavish vacations with his family cause much envy. Little do they know his 80+ hour work weeks leave him worn and give little time to make memories with loved ones. He treats them all to summer vacation splendors to reconnect and thank them for understanding. Sometimes he wishes he could trade the success for time, but knows he is able to provide a future and financial legacy if he just stays the course.

The budding millionaire has three innovative patents that have enabled her to “get rich quick”.  Growing up with little, her head is spinning when thinking about investments and managing her expanding wealth. Friends and relatives she never figured would leech are pressuring her for loans and pricey gifts and dinners. She is making waves and ready to date after spending years developing her products. But now, she isn’t sure if the suitors are wanting to get to know her or more about the patents or figures.

The county’s brightest student is off to an Ivy League – but his ultimate goal is to be a minister. His family and teachers desperately want to see those smarts equal a high profile job. He wants to do what is on his heart and is passionate about his dreams.

The grace and beauty of her small town is as lovely inside as she is outside. She has looks, smarts, and heart, and is complimented all the time on all three. Even though she is praised often, some jealous individuals try to make life difficult for her just because of her beauty. They are downright rude and constantly looking for flaws to make her seem less perfect. For all the good they have to say, they jab her with remarks about nearing the end of fertility, wasting her looks not thinking about making progeny, and scratching their heads about why with all that she has going for her she can’t “get a man.” They don’t understand the personal standards she has committed to and why she is cautious. She can’t tell them about all the times men have tried to pursue her only to be a notch in their belt or for less than savory intentions, about how she has to be extra careful because her beauty sometimes means unwanted predicaments. They would think she was full of herself to say such things.

No one has it all together. For all the steps we take forward, we encounter new obstacles. Our timelines are unique. There isn’t an ideal for everyone. Our milestones are ours to make, and were never meant to be compared. Just because someone’s struggles seem smaller doesn’t mean it doesn’t takes less out of them. When we pretend others have it all together, we only take the joy out of our lives by pining for something we only see through a lens.

I can choose to look around and feel like I’ve fallen short, or I can choose to look at my own path and see how far I’ve come.

My victories are no less victorious. My struggles are no less real. My journey is mine to take. I’m not going to assume that I, or others, will ever have it all together. Life is happy, sad, joyful, messy, hard, rewarding, sweet, and stressful. Life is not multiple choice, it’s essays. I was never meant to try to glance at others #2 graphite lead filled bubbles and try to copy. I was meant to write my heart out and try my personal best. Just like school days, you finish the last sentence and turn it and sigh deeply. It was hard, but you did what you could with what you knew and the resources you were given. And that’s the same for everyone.

Some Bedroom Decor Solved!

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Things are slowly starting to fall into place. My first step to making my room my sanctuary was to work on the bed. Beds are kind of the statement pieces, aren’t they? After all, that is what the room is named for.

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Comforter Image Credit: walmart.com

I was browsing a retailer site and found the perfect comforter. It’s much like the Anthropologie one I wanted a few years back…except this one isn’t $200.00…it’s $37. I’ll post pictures once I get everything together. The comforter is scheduled for store pickup today but I have my seminar this afternoon, so I probably won’t get things washed and set up until Friday. I went with Ivory because white scares me and I’m a bit scared of owning something so light. Especially since my dog sleeps on my bed 1/3 of the time. I need to find a blanket I can drape on the end of my bed to keep her cozy and catch all the hair she sheds.

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Picture Credit: costcochasers.com

And then, yesterday, I ran to Costco for some food staples and found some huge cushions that solve both my problems – back support/big pillows for reading and watching streamed content, and believe it or not, something in place of a headboard! They are technically floor cushions, so they are behemoths. I’m keeping the receipt just in case these guys don’t work out as planned in my head.

I also bought a small potted succulent family to live on my bookshelf. Now I have some green liveliness going too.

Now to not make my bed my catchall. I am notorious for this bad habit. I’ll bring in my clean clothes, fold them nicely, get half of it put away, then get distracted, and have to share some of my bedspace that night with the jacket I took off and didn’t hang, and the clothes I didn’t put away. Pretty pathetic right? It’s only another 5-10 minutes of putting away. I just need to not get to bed when utterly exhausted. And finish things one step at a time. Multitasking and getting distracted are my downfalls.

There are some other updates I’m considering but are more down the line. I’m not sure if I want to buy a small mountable TV or just get a large 27″ monitor. The 27″ monitor sounds like the best option except that I’m a Mac user and so that means a monitor that can be plugged into my Macbook Pro or buying the huge ole 27″ iMac which comes with a grand pricetag (we’re talking 2k or more for what I need). Let’s just say the other residents are not so sensitive to space and there are times when I’m watching something and they’ll try to change channels to watch their show during commercials, or I’ll watch something on my laptop and they’ll turn the TV on in the same room like that’s not blatantly rude. Uggh. So I need SOME sort of screen in my room that is large enough to watch stuff on while I use my bed as my sofa. My other idea is to try to find a midrange monitor that connects to my macbook pro so I can use that as my “desktop” screen but have the macbook pro for everyday use. A new macbook pro still sets me back a few thousand! Eek!

So yeah, updated pictures of these items in my room are coming soon!

A Little Bit of Everything

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Last week was very full!

The apologetics seminar went very well and our first speaker spent his whole time on how to speak to others that are inquisitive outside of our faith. Which is SO important! That without actually caring and having a relational connection, even the greatest orator would not persuade someone to listen. I truly appreciate that. There have been times when people who identify as Christian are so blatantly rude or criticizing I’m embarrassed to be grouped with them. Atheist and agnostic jokes and sarcastic remarks from the pulpit or general fellowship ARE NEVER OKAY. I ran like a chicken with my head cut off, heart beating fast from the moment I jetted out of work, prepped my items to eat out, and then got over there just in time to sign in and sit down! Whew! So glad that worked out well and the message was a great one to start with.

My boyfriend and I celebrated our anniversary this weekend. The day before we were gifted with tickets to a hockey game and so our celebration spanned two days! We’ve dated long enough where we didn’t need bells and whistles. Even though it’s a dating not marriage anniversary, he took time to look up the type of gift to buy and it said wood, so he bought me a limited edition book and designed a card from scratch with a wood texture on it. And treated me to a yummy sushi dinner! My gift for him was rather practical, but thought out too – a nice pair of sneakers to meet a need so he could dress it up or down. And with it, I included a big folded cardboard presentation board and wrote “Take a Walk Down Memory Lane.” For each year I made large shoe prints and dashes that led on for whatever lies ahead for us. And between each year I filled it with memories I could recall and daycations and fun things we did. Concerts, movies, new eateries, life events…

Trying to meal prep for two is not that easy. I’ve been running a couple minutes late trying to get breakfast ready and lunch prepared. My dad doesn’t quite understand my eating plan yet but is slowing reading through the book. He lost 3 pounds last week and believes that it works now. I’m very proud of him!

We had more house guests this weekend and I got to spend a full day with my youngest cousin on Saturday. She gave me the longest hug goodbye on Sunday. Being a state away, these cousin hangouts are a special treat.

Last but not least, I went to my first poetry/spoken word performance yesterday. The venue was small but the energy was powerful. Everyone had a different story to tell. Anecdotal, fanciful, romantic, ironic, or just amusing, the poems made their way through all kinds of emotions. My friend got to share her first published piece and it was a treat to be there. At poetry readings, you snap to let the performer know their piece isn’t just heard, it’s felt. I think that is beautiful.

Here’s to a great week ahead!